Hoywa folks! I’m Bread.
You might remember me from, oh I dunno, every breakfast, lunch and tea you had in your life. I’m a staple, what can I say? What’s the first thing you reach for when you walk into Lidl? This fella. And none of this upper crust stuff either: I’m a pan of the people, everybody can enjoy me.
I get on with everyone too: Butter, Ham, Lettuce, the shopping list goes on. (Cheese and me are like that!).
This fella Beef though, I just can’t warm to. The way he struts around the supermarket like he owns the place. Is he trying to get a rise outta me? And don’t talk to me about all the attention he’s getting! All about Beef is it? Yeah, like you wouldn’t know to look at him. My naan used to say nobody’s all bad, but she clearly never met Beef! He better steer clear of my aisle, that’s all I’m saying.
Right I’m outta here.